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Margo & George Forever? by @StephanieQueen | Book Tour + $25 Amazon GC #Giveaway | @SDSXXTours Presents Romantic Comedy

Margo & George Forever? by Stephanie Queen is on virtual book tour. The romantic comedy stops at Readeropolis today with an excerpt. Be sure to enter for a chance to win the giveaway for a $25 Amazon GC and follow the Silver Dagger book tour (for other dates see the link at the bottom of the post).




Margo & George Forever?
By Stephanie Queen
Genre: Romantic Comedy

There was no question in Margo's heart of hearts that she loved George. She really did want to marry him--scratch that--she really did want to be married to him.

There was a difference.


She hoped to heaven that the teeny-tiny distinction wouldn't be their undoing...

The stage is set for the wedding of the year in New York City featuring poor sweet beautiful Margo marrying the most eligible (read that: handsome and wealthy) bachelor, Regal Stores heir and CEO, George Regal, III. The Regal family has long presided over the social and fashion scene in Manhattan and they have embraced the marriage with enough enthusiasm to create a circus.

That could be why Margo feels like she's in the center ring and about to be swallowed by a lion.

But the best things about George, the strong powerful CEO, are the ones he's not known for, like his small thoughtful gifts, the crystal angel Christmas tree ornament he'd given her, the way he holds her hand at odd moments, the way he bear-hugs his grandma whenever he sees her and the way he speaks with misty eyes about his late mother.

Of course Margo wants to spend the rest of her life with him... if she could just get past the family’s ‘enthusiasm’ and THE WEDDING.

Warning: Once you open this book you'll get heart-warming romance, smiles, laughs & fun, but also an adult-sized portion of steamy love scenes. And of course, most important of all, a very satisfying Happily-Ever-After.





Stephanie Queen is the USA Today bestselling author of the romantic detective series, Beachcomber Investigations. She lives in the stunning state of New Hampshire with her family, her cat, Kitty and her fun-loving friends. Besides going to the gym sporadically, Stephanie cooks and crochets and loves chocolate covered potato chips (yes, she should go to the gym more often). 

She used to be a 9 to fiver working in downtown Boston, but has thrown her stylish suits and fancy heels in a closet and now hangs out in UConn t-shirts, jeans and sneakers. “If I could come back in another life as anything I wanted, I’d be a regency era heroine.” (Not surprisingly) Regency romances are her favorite secret reads.





Follow the tour HERE for exclusive excerpts and a giveaway!





Margo didn’t mind waiting until she’d had a swig of her drink before trying to explain herself. She wasn’t sure what to say—or what she thought, if truth be told. But it was time she unbottled whatever mess was inside her.

“I’m scared witless about this wedding circus." She paused. Her friends stared.

"I tremble at the thought of the outrageous pageantry as if I’m the queen of a minor Nordic country. I’m horrified that there will be a thousand freaking guests and I don’t know any of them—none but a handful. I have no idea what I’m supposed to say or do.”


Shenanigans by Gail Koger | Book Tour + $25 Amazon GC #Giveaway | @Askole & @SDSXXTours Present #ParanormalRomance #PNR

Shenanigans by Gail Koger is on virtual book tour. The paranormal romance stops at Readeropolis today with an excerpt. Be sure to enter for a chance to win the giveaway for a $25 Amazon GC and follow the Silver Dagger book tour (for other dates see the link at the bottom of the post).


Shenanigans
by Gail Koger
Genre: Paranormal Romance


Kandi Cain inherited her Dr. Doolittle abilities from her grandmother and became a psychic pet detective. To her dismay, she just acquired the power to communicate with the spirit world, but dead people give her the willies. 


Just when Kandi thought her life couldn’t get more complicated, the neighbor from hell moved in next door. The nasty guy’s name is Dutch Callaghan. How can someone so gorgeous be such a dick? Kandi could chalk some of it up to his job. Dutch is a Phoenix PD homicide cop. 

Kandi’s current case is rescuing a Yorkie from a brutal dog fighting ring. Little does she know her dog napping suspect is involved in a series of brutal murders. Disguised as an elderly nun, Kandi rescues the Yorkie and, in the process, blows the hell out of Dutch’s undercover operation.

Kandi now finds herself a person of interest in her client’s murder and her sexy-as-hell, pain-in-the-butt neighbor is in hot pursuit of the Ninja Nun. Is Dutch about to slap the cuffs on? Only time will tell.





How do I come up with my stories? Being psychotic helps. I was a 9-1-1 dispatcher for way too long. All those years of wild requests, screwy questions, bizarre behavior and outrageous demands have left me with a permanent twitch and an uncontrollable craving for chocolate. Don’t get me wrong. Working as a 9-1-1 dispatcher can be very rewarding. BUT - some days I felt like the entire world was nuts. I mean, c’mon, who in their right mind calls 9-1-1 for the winning lottery numbers? To keep from hitting myself repeatedly in the head with my phone, I took up writing.


I made the Night Owl's Awesome Paranormal Romance Authors List.





Follow the tour HERE for exclusive excerpts and a giveaway!




My name is Kandi Cain. How did I get stuck with this swell name? My mom, Margaret, is obsessed with Christmas. She even dresses as an elf in July. She had her ears surgically altered to be more elf-like. Ho. Ho. Ho. 

I got into more fist fights than I could count in school defending mom’s quirkiness and my name. When I was eight, Dad decided enough was enough and gave me boxing and karate lessons. By the time I reached high school, no one dissed my mother or me anymore. 

Our home is a shrine to Santa and his elves. The interior is a museum to rare and unique Christmas ornaments from the 19th century. The yard is decorated year-round with enormous Santas, giant candy canes and nutcracker statues. There’s an awe-inspiring amount of twinkling lights on the roof. They’re so bright, the astronauts complained. 

I think my mother’s preoccupation with Christmas started when her father got drafted during the Vietnam war. Before he was sent on his second deployment, he took leave to spend Christmas with his family. He was killed in action six weeks later. 

My father, Nick Cain, is a very large Santa look-a-like. He was a mob enforcer for the Gambino family until he met my mother at a Christmas party. It was love at first sight. To keep her safe, my Dad quit his job and they quietly moved from New York to Apache Junction, Arizona. Apache Junction is a small tourist town located at the base of the Superstition Mountains. The town caters to people interested in visiting the numerous ghost towns and hunting for the Lost Dutchman’s gold mine. 

When Dad isn’t playing Santa, he’s a member of the Superstition Mountains Search and Rescue squad and a highly sought-after rattlesnake wrangler. 

I was two when my parents found me in the backyard surrounded by birds, skunks, coyotes, jackrabbits, dogs, cats and a big ass mountain lion. I was giggling happily and petting them. My Dad said he almost crapped himself. 

Mom wasn’t pleased I had inherited her mother’s psychic talents. She wanted me to have a “normal” childhood. As if. My ability to summon and communicate with critters grew until they were forced to ask Grandma Hester for help. They didn’t know how to deal with a miniature Doctor Doolittle.

My mother and Grandma Hester are poles apart. My grandmother always reminded me of the Queen of England with her crazy hats, brightly colored polyester suits, pearl necklaces and pristine white gloves. C’mon who still wears gloves? In the summer? In Phoenix? 

My grandma lived her entire life in a dazzling pink gingerbread house located in the historic district of Phoenix. Her two acres of orange trees kept the neighbors supplied with fruit. 

Overwhelmed by requests to find lost pets, and unable to live on the military’s survivor’s benefits, Grandma Hester started a pet detective agency called Finders. I was seven when I started helping her locate missing pets. I discovered I had a knack for it and once I started my hunt, I never failed to track down the lost dog, cat, horse, parakeet or pot-bellied pig. When I graduated from high school, I became a full-time pet detective. Since the pay wasn’t the greatest, I moved in with Grandma Hester and didn’t miss the Christmas music at all. 

News of Grandma Hester’s ability to find missing pets spread and a movie star flew her to Hawaii to find his missing tiger. Her helicopter went down in a storm and the wreckage was never found. It felt like a piece of my heart had died with her. 

She left me her house, the business and a bank account with the grand total of three thousand dollars in it. The bad news was, the house needed a new roof. The price tag was ten thousand dollars and our rainy season was rapidly approaching. 

Two months after my grandmother died, the neighbor from hell moved in. One look at his muddy red aura and I knew he would be a problem. The asshole’s name is Dutch Callaghan. He reminds of that guy who plays Thor in the movies. How can someone so gorgeous be such a prick? 

I could chalk some of it up to his job. Dutch is a Phoenix PD homicide detective. I know the long hours and the blood and gore would make me cranky. I even baked the ass some “welcome to the neighborhood” cookies. He took one bite and dumped them in the trash. I’ll admit I’m not the best cook in the world, but that was downright rude. 

Then the bastard said, “I don’t do pity fucks.” 

I was so stunned, I just stood there gaping at him. With a nasty smile Dutch stomped off. 

Me a pity fuck? Did I look that desperate? My temper flared to life and I yelled, “I’m not a pity fuck.” 

“And I don’t pay for sex either,” the asshole yelled back. 

He thought I was a prostitute? Oh, hell no. This meant war. The jerk had spent hours washing his big, black, high-rider truck. I summoned a flock of pigeons and had them crap on it. Repeatedly. “Game on asshole.”

Resistance by @authorASMcGowan | Book Tour + $15 Amazon GC #Giveaway | @SDSXXTours Presents #SciFi

Resistance by A.S. McGowan is on virtual book tour. The science fiction stops at Readeropolis with an excerpt.

Be sure to enter for a chance to win the giveaway for a $15 Amazon GC and follow the Silver Dagger book tour (for other dates see the link at the bottom of the post).




Resistance
Cockiest Red Planet Trilogy Book 1
by A.S. McGowan
Genre: SciFi


What would you do if the laws allowed anyone with money to Trademark an everyday word? Or the copyrighting of a name, so no one could ever use that name again? 


Over a hundred years ago, Earth was dying. A few rich men and women banned together to create a kingdom on Mars. They hand picked the people who would join them in this new kingdom. Then they brought their arrogant beliefs and made them laws. The Trademark Commission was established to allow anyone who could afford it, the ability to trademark any common word. The laws stated that once a word was trademarked no one could speak that word again. The Naming Commission ensures that all names are copyrighted and no one uses another person's copyrighted name. Fines and even prison time are given to those who violate the trademark and copyright laws. 

Kathryn 5.0 was pregnant with her first child when the word 'baby' is trademarked. Forced to refer to her baby as "little human" she is tired of the 100 year old laws. Reaching out to friends, she works to create a resistance. Together they fight against the trademark and copyright laws. Battle lines are drawn and it is family against family. Those who resist the laws are branded "Bullies" while those who support the ancient laws wave the "Victim" banner.


**Only .99 cents!!**



I am a wife and mother, who lives in a small Southeast Missouri town. I am the author of the Centaur Agency series. Currently I am working on book 3 in the series The Making of a Centaur which will publish in July 2017. I also have plans for a vampire trilogy that I am working on. I will be publishing the trilogy after I finish the 4 book Centaur Agency series. From there I also am working on a Werewolf series. So much planned with a little bit for everyone. 


Follow the tour HERE for exclusive excerpts, guest posts and a giveaway!



Kathryn 5.0 walked down the hard-packed, red dirt streets. The heat wave sucked the air from her lungs. With her hands under her swollen belly, she tried to elevate some of the strain on her back. Only three weeks to go and her baby would be born. She should be excited, but she was worried. The Naming Commission told her today that the name she wanted has already registered. Sadly, Luna was registered last month to someone else’s baby girl. The only option they offered her was to name her baby Luna 2.0. She did not want her child to be a point anything, she wanted her child to have a unique name. To be the first registered.

When she reached her house, she darted inside. The cool air was a blessed relief from the outside heat. The sweat on her body practically froze on her skin. Plopping down on the bright teal wooden bench, she removed her shoes. She slid them under the bench then stood and shook the red dust from the bottom of her long blue skirt. It was a daily struggle to keep the dust out of the home, especially when it clung to everything. It seemed all the women in the kingdom sported the red stains upon the hem of their skirts. She hated it. Not long ago she had petitioned the Fashion Commission to allow shorter lengths to prevent this. They shot her down instantly. The women who sat on the Commission were the fashion superiors and their word was law.

Inside the living room, she sat on the bright yellow sofa. Her feet propped up on the white wooden coffee table. She put her earphones in and clicked the button on the sound system remote. She was that way when her husband came home. She noted that he had removed his shoes but still wore his cream-colored cotton pants and matching tunic work suit. He joined her on the sofa, placed his hand on her stomach, and smiled. She took the earphones out and turned off the sound system.

“How did it go at the Naming Commission?” His voice held a hint of anticipation. His smile lit his face up.

“Not good. The name we wanted was already registered. I want a unique name for our baby.” She looked at him, her eyes pleaded with him to offer up a unique name.

“Well you need to stop referring to the child as ‘baby.’ I heard on the city speakers that the word “baby” is now a registered trademark. We can’t afford to be sued for using the word.” He shook his head.

“Surely the use in our home if acceptable.” Turning she faced him, her eyebrow lifted.
“There are eyes and ears everywhere, Kathryn 5.0, we can’t risk it. Use the term little human from now on.” He lovingly patted her stomach again. “So, what’s for dinner?”
“I thought we would have cucumber soup. With this heat, a chilled dish would be most welcomed.” She hated the way he deflected from the subject at hand. She knew he was looking forward to the name Luna just as much as she was. Instead, he focused on a trademarked word and violations.

“Kathryn 5.0! You know that James 3.0 registered a trademark for the word soup a couple of months ago. Remember, it is liquid puree now.” He looked at her the way a parent would look at an errant child.

“I am sorry, Matthew 7.0, of course. Dinner is cucumber liquid puree.” She smiled at her husband. He was more concerned with the Trademark Commission and all the trademarked words than she was. Then again, in his line of work as a lawyer, she could see how such things would affect him more than her.

They ate their dinner in silence at the small table in the kitchen. Finishing his dinner, Matthew 7.0 disappeared into his private office. She remained in the kitchen to clean up. There were nights like this where she wished she was one of the Elite. The Elite were allowed various servants to take care of daily chores. Uppers such as herself were denied these luxuries.
She was placing the dishes into the dish cleaning machine when her husband came in. He had changed out of his work suit and now wore a sage green tunic with matching pants. He was smiling the smile that always meant he had big news to share. She couldn’t help but smile back at his infectious smile.
He grabbed her and spun her around. Laughing and squealing, she begged to be put down. When he put her down, he kissed her. Breathless, she smiled up at him. His sparkling blue eyes mesmerized her, pulling her in.
“I have the perfect name for our little human.” He was giddy. “Minka!”
“Minka?” She scrunched up her nose. What kind of name was that?
“You wanted her to have her own unique name. I think Minka would be just that kind of name. What do you say?” He gave her those puppy dog eyes and smiled at her. His dimple gave him a boyish look that reminded her of when they were young.
He was right, it was very unique. What would be the odds of someone already registering that name? “Okay, I will go to the Naming Commission tomorrow and register her name as Minka.”
“Good. Good. Now our little girl will have a name.” He smiled again and left the kitchen to prepare for bed.
She finished loading the dish cleaning machine. With that chore done, she grabbed the floor sweeper and swept up the light traces of red dust. She looked at the floor washer and sighed. She remembered when it was called a mop and one simply mopped their floors. But about ten years ago someone decided to trademark the word mop. Some people get use to the words being trademarked and forbidden to be used by anyone other than the trademark holder. Kathryn 5.0 was not one of those people. She hated the practice and wished people would put a stop to it.

She wondered what life was like before the practice as she slowly made her way upstairs. It seemed that each step was a struggle. She wished someone would have told her how difficult simple tasks were when one was at the end of their pregnancy. When she finally made her way to bed, she settled in and made plans to go speak with her grandmother in the morning.


Cusp of Night by @MaeClair1 | Book Tour + $10 Amazon GC #Giveaway | @SDSXXTours Presents #Thriller #Suspense

Cusp of Night (Hode’s Hill #1) by Mae Clair is on virtual book tour. The suspense thriller stops at Readeropolis with an excerpt.

Be sure to enter for a chance to win the giveaway for a $10 Amazon GC and follow the Silver Dagger book tour (for other dates see the link at the bottom of the post).


CUSP OF NIGHT
Hode’s Hill #1


by Mae Clair
Genre: Thriller/Suspense

Pub Date: 6/12/2018




The truth hides in dark places…

Recently settled in Hode’s Hill, Pennsylvania, Maya Sinclair is enthralled by the town’s folklore, especially the legend about a centuries-old monster. A devil-like creature with uncanny abilities responsible for several horrific murders, the Fiend has evolved into the stuff of urban myth. But the past lives again when Maya witnesses an assault during the annual “Fiend Fest.” The victim is developer Leland Hode, patriarch of the town’s most powerful family, and he was attacked by someone dressed like the Fiend.

Compelled to discover who is behind the attack and why, Maya uncovers a shortlist of enemies of the Hode clan. The mystery deepens when she finds the journal of a late nineteenth-century spiritualist who once lived in Maya’s house—a woman whose ghost may still linger. Known as the Blue Lady of Hode’s Hill due to a genetic condition, Lucinda Glass vanished without a trace and was believed to be one of the Fiend’s tragic victims. The disappearance of a young couple, combined with more sightings of the monster, trigger Maya to join forces with Leland’s son Collin. But the closer she gets to the truth, the closer she comes to a hidden world of twisted secrets, insanity, and evil that refuses to die…





Mae Clair opened a Pandora’s Box of characters when she was a child and never looked back. Her father, an artist who tinkered with writing, encouraged her to create make-believe worlds by spinning tales of far-off places on summer nights beneath the stars.

Mae loves creating character-driven fiction in settings that vary from contemporary to mythical. Wherever her pen takes her, she flavors her stories with conflict, romance and elements of mystery. Married to her high school sweetheart, she lives in Pennsylvania and is passionate about writing, old photographs, a good Maine lobster tail and cats.





Follow the tour HERE for exclusive excerpts, guest posts and a giveaway!





Within moments, Charlotte was outside in the dismal weather. The drizzle had steadied into a light rain, pattering in a ceaseless rhythm against the cobblestones. The gas lamp on the corner was barely visible through the thickening fog. It would be a rough ride back in the carriage, bordering on miserable, now that she’d lost the opportunity to communicate with her deceased mother and share the news of Reginald’s birth. Drawing the collar of her cloak about her throat, Charlotte hurried down Chicory toward the alley. How far to the carriage? The fog played tricks with the

distance, shapes materializing from the mist with an abruptness that made her regret not taking the lamp Frederick offered. When a cat shot out in front of her, she gasped.

“Silly animal.” Pressing a hand to her heart, she breathed deeply.

The feline darted across the alley, vanishing into the mist. Were those footsteps behind her?

She glanced over her shoulder, but it was impossible to see more than a few feet. Rain trickled from the edge of the umbrella and splattered onto her gloves. Quickening her pace, she scurried forward. She’d only managed a few steps when the footsteps echoed again.

Once more she looked over her shoulder. “Frederick.” Perhaps he’d left the carriage in search of her when the rain grew heavier. “Frederick?”

The footsteps quickened, lengthening into a fleet run. Hair prickled on the back of her neck. She hesitated, torn between fleeing and needing to see who followed. Within seconds, a painted face bobbed in front of her from the fog. The macabre mask hung disembodied, a leering devil with ice white eyes and cadaverous grin.

The Fiend! Dear God, the monster was real.

Charlotte screamed and tried to run, her long skirts twisting about her ankles. Stumbling, she dropped her umbrella. “Frederick!” Her frightened cry echoed through the night, swallowed by the fog. “Oh, Frederick, please help!”

Fingers fisted on the back of her cloak and yanked hard, wheeling her around and tugging, until she was pressed up against the hard body of the Fiend. Trapped mere inches from that demonic face and hateful gaze, she swooned. Her vision spun into a funnel curtained with fog and rain as if the night had blindfolded her. A stinging flare of heat ripped across her stomach, chased by something sticky and damp. She tried to find her breath and wheezed out a faint bubble. “Oh!”

Pain ruptured upward from her navel. Fire seared her voice and left her choking soundlessly on cold air. Her knees buckled. The Fiend released her, and she wilted to the cobblestones, conscious of a dark stain spreading beneath her.

Blood.

The stench of hot metal and damp wool clotted her nostrils. She choked on tears, overcome by the realization she would never cradle her baby again or see the husband who had given her such a precious gift. A foolish woman, she’d paid for her folly. Why hadn’t she heeded Henry and stayed safe at home? Blood plastered her bodice to her skin, sticky heat against the rain. She folded to the side—down to the damp press of cobblestones

against her cheek, the thick gathering silt of the dead. 

The Fiend stepped closer. Hunkered down near her head.

Charlotte forced herself to grip the hand that clutched the bloody knife. Twisting her neck, she stared up into the awful leering face. “Why? Please…tell me why.”

The slice of the blade across her throat paid her passage to Summerland.


Catching Dragos by Gail Koger | Book Tour + Handcrafted Fired Glass Earrings #Giveaway | @Askole & @SDSXXTours Present #ParanormalRomance #PNR

Catching Dragos by Gail Koger is on virtual book tour. The paranormal romance stops at Readeropolis with an excerpt.

Be sure to enter for a chance to win the giveaway for a pair of handcrafted fired glass earrings (winners choice of blue or gold) and follow the Silver Dagger book tour (for other dates see the link at the bottom of the post).



Catching Dragos
by Gail Koger
Genre: Paranormal Romance


Everyone calls Mariah Smith the Judge. No, she doesn't wear a black robe or sit on a bench. She provides a unique service to those who have been wronged. She's an expert in paybacks both psychic and magical.


Mariah's next target is the famous supermodel Fabian. Smoking hot body, the face of an Italian sinner and dumb as a rock. His crime? Sticky fingers. The man whore makes millions of dollars a year, but can't resist seducing elderly women out of their jewelry? How does she resist all that tanned, male perfection and unmask Fabian as the gigolo he truly is?


Mariah soon discovers Mister Sticky fingers isn't quite as dim-witted as he acts. He's actually the Dragos clan's top demon hunter who is stealing back magical artifacts that open gateways to hell. Now that she's attracted Fabian's attention, he's determined to possess her and her magical abilities.  





How do I come up with my stories? Being psychotic helps. I was a 9-1-1 dispatcher for way too long. All those years of wild requests, screwy questions, bizarre behavior and outrageous demands have left me with a permanent twitch and an uncontrollable craving for chocolate. Don’t get me wrong. Working as a 9-1-1 dispatcher can be very rewarding. BUT - some days I felt like the entire world was nuts. I mean, c’mon, who in their right mind calls 9-1-1 for the winning lottery numbers? To keep from hitting myself repeatedly in the head with my phone, I took up writing.




I made the Night Owl's Awesome Paranormal Romance Authors List.





Follow the tour HERE for exclusive excerpts and a giveaway!

 





My name’s Mariah Smith, but everyone calls me the Judge. No, I don’t wear a black robe or sit on a bench. Using my psychic and magical abilities, I provide a unique service to those who have been wronged. I’m in the business of paybacks.

How did I choose this career path? Justice. I wanted justice for my father. Dad was one hell of a cop. His partner, Dan Harvey, not so much.

Dan’s midlife crisis led him to dump his wife of twenty years and shack up with Bambi, a hot-to-trot teenager. When my dad found out she was only sixteen, he tried to talk his partner into stopping the affair. When that didn’t work, my father was forced to tell the chief of police what was going on.

That ended Dan’s career, his illicit affair, and their partnership. The court sentenced the idiot to a year in county lockup. The minute Dan got out of jail and foundout Bambi had moved on to fresher game, he lost it.

He cleaned out his ex-wife’s bank account, shot my father, and fled. My dad survived but had to learn to walk again. The lame-ass detective they assigned to the case misplaced the evidence, and the county attorney refused to prosecute. 

Using my rather awesome psychic abilities, I tracked the jerk to Mexico. While my dad recovered from a bullet in the back, Dan was having the time of his life in Acapulco.

He drove a flashy red sports car and had a luxury villa with a spectacular view of the bay. I was going to teach Dan a well-deserved lesson. First he would lose his libido, his looks, his money, the car, and the villa.

Dan’s oversexed libido was in high gear, and he wasn’t content until he had bedded at least five women a day. Did he practice safe sex? Hell, no. He liked going commando, and Senorita Clap soon had him walking like a bowlegged cowboy. It was a real shame his meds didn’t work.

Disguised as a maid, I soon discovered Dan took a popular baldness drug that had some rather nasty side effects. It caused men’s genitals to shrink, and within a month 80 percent of the users became impotent. I tripled his dose, and damn, it worked. He couldn’t get it up, and not even the little blue pill helped.

Dan was an extremely vain man. Instead of getting braces for his son, he blew the money on veneers for his own teeth. I added a mixture of nicotine, black tar, and a dash of magic to his toothpaste. Presto! Pearly whites gone. I hacked his bank account, sent the money back to his ex-wife, and reported Dan’s bogus credit cards to the Mexican Federales and his landlord.

Next, I hotwired Dan’s sports car and drove it down to the poorer side of town. I watched gleefully as it was stripped down to the frame. I had it towed back to his villa. Dan threw a hissy fit and unloaded his Glock into the remains. Sometimes getting your car back simply isn’t enough.

Dan’s expression when he got arrested for fraud? Priceless. He’s now doing time in a Mexican prison. That’s what I call justice.

As time passed, my reputation grew. I became very selective about the cases I took. I’m not a killer. My retributions were carefully planned out to expose the villains’ crimes and get closure for the victims.

My current target was the famous supermodel Fabian. Smoking hot body, the face of an Italian sinner, and dumb as a rock. His crime? Sticky fingers. The man-whore makes millions of dollars a year, but can’t resist seducing elderly women out of their jewelry? I’m not talking about mature women of fifty or sixty. I’m talking old. His latest victim, Ethel Rossi, was eighty-five, hard of hearing, and had a bad habit of misplacing her dentures.

Rumor has it, Ethel fell asleep during the act. Maybe Fabian’s not the fabled lover everyone says he is. The Rossi family hired me to retrieve the three-hundred-year-old medallion he walked off with and unmask him as the gigolo he truly was.

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